This poem was written by Cristyana Farias as a reflective activity exploring what she learned during the 2026 Trainee Program.
The CanFASD Trainee program was developed in 2021 to bring together new and early-career researchers and professionals (e.g., students, learners, research assistants, or junior research staff) working in the field of FASD. The overall objective of this program is to facilitate connection, community building, and collaboration among up-and-coming FASD researchers in Canada.
We hope you enjoy reading the poem!
Learning to Listen
I entered this program
with questions in my hands,
a thesis still becoming,
and a hope
that research could become more human.
I thought I was coming to learn
about fetal alcohol spectrum disorder,
about prevention, diagnosis, assessment,
support, policy, and practice.
I thought I was coming to build knowledge.
And I was.
But I have also learned
that knowledge is not only found
in articles, slides, frameworks,
or carefully designed research questions.
Knowledge also lives in stories.
It lives in the voices of individuals with FASD.
It lives in caregivers who keep advocating.
It lives in families who know the gaps
because they have had to move through them.
It lives in communities
who have always known more
than systems have been willing to hear.
This program has reminded me
that FASD is not only a diagnosis.
It is a life lived in classrooms,
clinics, homes, waiting rooms,
assessment reports, school meetings,
service systems, and everyday moments
where understanding can either be offered
or withheld.
It is also strength.
It is creativity.
It is persistence.
It is relationship.
It is the work of being seen fully
in a world that often sees only challenges.
Through the trainee program,
I have learned that lived experience
is not an addition to research.
It is not a small section
to include after the literature review.
It is not something to consult
only after the questions have already been chosen.
Lived experience is a foundation.
It asks researchers
to slow down.
To listen before deciding.
To ask who is missing from the conversation.
To notice whose priorities shape the work.
To think about whether research is useful
to the people it is meant to support.
I have learned
that prevention is not blame.
Prevention is care.
Prevention is context.
Prevention is safety.
Prevention is support before crisis.
It is asking what barriers existed,
what pain was carried,
what services were unavailable,
what information was unclear,
and what might have helped.
It is remembering
that alcohol use during pregnancy
does not happen outside of life.
It happens within stress,
poverty, violence, trauma, isolation,
mental health, relationships, racism,
colonialism, access to care,
and social support.
It happens within systems.
And if we ignore those systems,
we risk turning prevention
into judgment.
I have also learned
that stigma can be quiet.
It can live in the words we choose.
It can live in the assumptions we make.
It can live in referrals,
in forms,
in research questions,
in services,
and in silence.
Stigma appears
when people are spoken about
more than they are spoken with.
It appears
when caregivers must keep proving
what they already know.
It appears
when individuals with FASD
are reduced to deficits,
instead of understood as whole people
with strengths, needs, identities,
and knowledge of their own lives.
This program has also taught me
that cultural safety
is not something we can simply claim.
It is not a checkbox.
It is not a training completed once.
It is not proven by good intentions.
Cultural safety is felt
by the person across from us.
It is built through trust,
humility, respect,
and the careful use of power.
It means seeing people fully.
Not as assumptions.
Not as statistics.
Not as problems to solve.
Not as a diagnosis to study.
But as people
with histories, cultures, families,
strengths, grief, wisdom,
and the right to define
what safety means for them.
I have learned that community-based research
is not only a method.
It is a responsibility.
It asks us to build relationships
before we collect answers.
It asks us to share power,
not just invite feedback.
It asks us to make research accessible,
not only academically strong.
It asks us to think about consent, language, trust,
time, transportation, technology,
communication needs, and whether participation
feels meaningful to the person giving their time.
It asks us
not only to ask questions,
but to become worthy
of the stories people share.
As a trainee,
I am still learning
how to listen well.
Not to listen
for what confirms what I already think.
Not to listen
so I can quickly respond.
But to listen
for what research has missed.
To listen for the gap
between what systems say they provide
and what families experience.
To listen for the difference
between access on paper
and access in real life.
To listen for the voices
that have been present all along,
even when research did not make enough room
to hear them.
This program has offered me
connection, mentorship, reflection,
and a sense of belonging
within a field that asks us
to keep learning.
It has reminded me
that knowledge translation
is not only about sharing findings.
It is about making knowledge useful.
It is about making knowledge reachable.
It is about making knowledge respectful.
It is about making sure
that the people most impacted
can see themselves in the work.
I carry forward the reminder
that FASD research must be relational,
strengths-based, trauma-informed,
culturally safe, and guided
by those who live it.
Research should not only describe communities.
It should honour them.
It should not only open a file.
It should open a door.
It should not only ask,
“What do we need to know?”
It should also ask,
“Who needs to be heard?”
“What needs to change?”
“What barriers have we helped create?”
“And how can we walk alongside you?”
This program has taught me
that good research begins
not with having the answer,
but with being willing
to sit with the question
beside the people
who have been answering it
all along.
Cristyana Farias is a Master of Arts student in Applied Psychology in the Clinical stream at Laurentian University. Her research interests include FASD, neurodivergence, lived experience, and community-based research. Her thesis focuses on research priorities and participation barriers among individuals with FASD, caregivers, families, and researchers.
Interested in learning more about Cristyana’s work? Read her blogpost on questions researchers should ask when doing community-based work!